For the past month or so, I've been slacking on my projects. A lot is going on right now in my life, of which I will not elaborate. Anyway, I've missed the enjoyment I always had in my work with Sever. RefLib is not complete, though I planned to finish it by...right now. Anyway, I still have a ways to go with it, so Sever will be put off even longer.
Due to all the distractions, Sever rarely crossed my mind over the past month. But today a co-worker asked me about my personal projects and I ended up showing her Sever and Idea, and suddenly I realized how much I had invested in them and how much enjoyment I'd had working on them. And suddenly I dearly wished that I could drop everything, form a team, and work on them fulltime. I've had that wish many times before, but it hadn't been seen for over a month.
I sometimes wonder what it is about software development that intrigues me. I think it is similar to what novelists feel...in more ways than one. On the surface, you could say that mainstream developers are like mainstream novelists. They spit out their projects like a machine gun and reel in the money. But underneath, you'll see that some developers (ex. indie) are like the rare novelist that writes for his own fulfillment, sans success.
There is something about seeing all the code I've written come together on the screen. Knowing that my blood and sweat actually accomplished something. I can't get enough of it. Knowing that I'm capable of creating a full-fledged real-deal computer game, ignoring the scale, baffles me. It makes me feel like I can do anything.
There is also something about the indie cause. I call it a cause because it seems all indie developers have a common purpose: to bypass the publisher and enter unfamiliar territory, doing what hasn't been done before. The thought that I'm creating a game that is new and original excites me.
Plus, I feel I'm not settling. Many indie developers create casual games, as they're called. Casual games have their place, but I want to create something of real merit. Something with depth. Something immersive, beyond casual. Not many indie games can claim such a feat. But Introversion is one developer who's done it. Games they've made stand up to mainstream games. Many indie developers cower beneath the mainstream, but Introversion stands apart with games that are different but every bit as fun. And the ambience of their games is often more influential than your average mainstream game. It is that that I am striving for. I don't know that I'll achieve it any time soon, but I'm not going to stop until I do.
It's this passion that drives me. I just hope I'll eventually have the resources and the luck to make a living off of it.
On a different note, Microsoft plans to release XNA 2.0 later this year. This will be pivotal in the development of Sever. There is a new feature in the upcoming release that was conspicuously absent in the previous: multiplayer support! One of my biggest discouragements during the development of Sever was knowing that I could never really test the gameplay. I could never actually play the game. Of course if I were to stick some AI in there, I could, but I don't know enough. That will take a ton of work and research just to figure out. And I'd probably run through a hundred tries at the AI before I'd have something that would actually work.
Anyway, this news has me excited. Unfortunately, I'm afraid that I might have to start over on my development of Sever because its current structure may not be comfortable for multiplayer networking. Then again I could be wrong and it might be just perfect. We'll just have to wait and see.
The most important mission of this post is to remind my readers (and myself) that I'm still excited about Sever and I have no intention of dropping it. Thank you for sticking with me, and please stick with me a little longer. Thanks.
clevceo
